Snuggies: As Seen on TV and Sometimes Real Life

Dog in a Snuggie

Inside, I'm screaming. And barking. But mostly screaming.

Remember the days when a “snuggie” meant you needed to pull your underwear out of your arse?  I sure wish people would pull their heads out of the dark when it comes to the current “Snuggie” phenomenon.   I mean, is it really fashionable / morally okay to wear a robe backwards?  Are people too lazy to put their arms AROUND or, dare I say it, OVER a blanket to eat popcorn while sitting on the couch? Who are these people who apparently have such a  great deal of difficulty accessing their own limbs when covered? When I walk down the street I can’t help but wonder if each person I pass has the same difficulty, and if perhaps I am merely superhumanly endowed with limb finesse. I don’t understand how this was THE gift of the holiday season last year (although I refuse to comment on whether I gave it to my grandma or an aunt).  The only reason I didn’t re-gift the leopard print one given to me is that it came with a hilarious “Snuggie Sutra” book.  Admittedly I read the book but no one can prove that I ever broke the  fuzzy fun out of the box!

Now the “As Seen on TV” commercials are trying to revive the Snuggie franchise by using the “Macarena” song.  What a great idea! (I would point out that I’m being sarcastic, but to anyone reading this blog it must already be so very obvious.) Let’s use a song that’s as outdated as Southwest print wallpaper to sell a product as innovative as a shirt worn inside out!  And everyone is jumping aboard this freight train… college university mascots, NFL licensees, and the spots off of  wild animals (ha!).  If I ever saw a fan wearing one of these warm, fuzzy bizzarro blankets at a game, I would throw a slushy in his or her face “GLEE” style! And do we really subject our beloved pets to this? For shame. Are there tail holes so that we can tell the dogs aren’t wagging anymore?

Snuggie Sutra Book

Who needs a bed if you have a blanket with arm holes?

Now, I cannot say that all “As Seen on TV” products are as ridiculous as this.  I must admit I bought the “ShamWow” towels and have used them to clean up kool-aid spills on children and rain on outdoor furniture.  I have been tempted to purchase the “Debbie Meyer Green Bags” for keeping fruits, vegetables, & flowers fresh (and I have wondered if they’d work on husbands too).  And I’ve seen the “Topsy Turvy” tomato planter actually hard at work.  These products are supposed to be solutions to everyday issues, to help make life easier.  So, I guess, if arm holes make blankets more accessible to the general population, so be it. Come to think of it, my scathing attitude toward the Snuggie may really just be jealously in the fact that I didn’t think to market robes for backwards wear and make myself a millionaire!

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